2001 Space Odyssey (1968)

Have you ever been so confused by something that you wanted to cry? If you have ever tried to understand soap operas then the answer to that question is yes. Now let me ask you this, have you ever been so bored that you fell asleep? If you have ever sat through a lecture about the history of paper clips then the answer to that question is yes. Where am I going with this? Sitting through 2001: A Space Odyssey was like sitting through a really long, really boring, soap opera about paper clips. I will admit, however, it was better seeing it for the second time.

The first time I watched this movie when I was a freshman in high school. My astronomy teacher, who only had 9 toes, somehow reasoned that this movie was somehow related enough to astronomy that we could spend three days watching it in class. He was in the same club of teachers (football coaches) that thought that Cheech and Chong movies were related to U.S. History.

The plot of 2001: A Space Odyssey, like many Stanley Kubrick films, is a little pointless. Can I just go on record and say that there is no reason that Stanley Kubrick should be famous. All of his movies are confusing, long, and very slow paced. His biggest problem is a never ending supply of scenes that have no sway on the film at all. I think that Mr. Kubrick has never heard of deleting scenes from a movie if they hinder pacing in the film. Having said that let's get down to brass tacks. The bulk of the plot follows a space crew on their way to Jupiter to investigate mysterious monoliths appearing all over the solar system. Hal, the intelligent computer that runs everything on the ship, is the only "crew member" that knows this and turns homicidal to keep it a secret.

I know the plot sounds awesome but Stanley ruins it. This movie is full of pointless scenes, including a whole half hour of monkeys fighting and ten minutes of psychedelic space travel. Not only that, the monoliths are never explained. Maybe that's why critics like it so much. There is an unexplained aspect about the movie that let's them speculate. Unexplained things in movies is like catnip for critics. Don't get me wrong, I love exploring the hidden message of movies, but there is a difference between hidden messages and omitting important information for the sake of being confusing. That's just poor movie making. The only saving grace about this movie is the music and the special effects, but that's not enough to make this movie watchable.

The bottom line:
Rating: 2.2
Would I own it? Not in a million light years (Yes I know light years is a unit of distance not time. It just sounds good.)
Would I recommend it? Only if a scientist was looking for new things to invent (such as carrot flavored juice boxes or "Grip Shoes")

If you have a lot of time to kill here is the really long space travel scene I talked about. The first minute is a good indication of what the whole clip is like so if you don't want to watch the whole thing, but do want to know what I'm talking about when I say that scenes are pointless then watch a little bit of it.